Skip to main content

The Expecting of the Unexpecting Mother

Most generally, I expect too much of myself these days. I expect to "feel better." I expect make it through work without crying when I see prego girl due in April. I expect others to be kind. I expect myself to heal at a much faster rate than humanly possible. Not because I want to forget her, but because it hurts so badly to feel this pain. Truly, I am not for sure what to expect heading down this journey and all I know is what I feel and what I learn from other peoples experiences. I do know I miss my butterfly and wish she didn't have to fly away so soon.

Today we starting packing and we did so for most of the day. I actually expected that I would cry, but I didn't. Funny how that works. Sometimes my tears over take me at the inconvenient times...of course not at home when I am expecting them! We haven't packed the basement with all of Zoe's things though...alas, the tears will flow. Of course we didn't put her little urn away either, I will cry then as well. We should be placing her in her new car seat, but life didn't deal us that card.

Right now each day seems to be a little more difficult. I believe the situation has begun to settle and I am beginning to understand it's true magnitude. I do know my daughter has left a legacy of love... a trail of peace and friendship, despite the tears we shed. Her touch extends deeper then I can see or comprehend. Sometimes I wish I could see her just one more time, hold her and kiss her just one more time. I expect I would continue to say that no matter how many "one more times" I was granted.

Comments

  1. beautifully written from the heart! Thanks for sharing it with us...your right...the brief time she was here on earth...she brought so much love and happiness to your life and for that I am sure you will always be grateful for...no matter how short it was...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Try not to be too hard on yourself. This is a pain that is incredibly severe. I expected myself to be feeling more "at peace" 6 months after my loss and I'm still so upset. Hugs.

    ReplyDelete
  3. You're doing remarkably well, Kate! I so wish that I could give you that "one last time" with your Zoefly. You're a wonderful mommy to her, and I can't wait for you to get to experience that powerful love again.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I can't believe it happened to me!

Sometimes I am in complete awe that we have a baby. I am so in love with River and I feel very fortunate! River is a really good baby; She eats great, sleeps well, smiles tons and is easily comforted when cranky. I am really happy to have her here. On the flip side, I am learning all of the beautiful things I missed out with Zoe. Bath time, reading books, cuddling, smiling, cooing, bites of new foods, so on and so forth...the list could go on forever. I still battle with postpartum depression, but I do feel like I am coming out on the other side. My sad days are fewer apart. I still feel terribly guilty that I battle depression. We have tried so long and so hard for a baby that it seems selfish of me to be sad when we have a perfect baby in our arms. HOWEVER, it's not the kind of thing I can control. I still have a lot of depression related to nursing. It hurts me that it didn't work for me...sigh. But, River is super healthy and growing well and at the end of the day, SHE is t...

Our Rainbow!!!!!

Amazing...simply amazing. I am soaking up every moment. I am so thankful for our little girl. So...introducing River Zoelle Mirth 8 pounds, 11 ounces and 22 inches long!!! Labor was long, hard yet amazingly wonderful. 12 hours of labor and just over 3 hours of pushing (these are the things the docs don't tell you can happen!!!) But we did it!!! Our rainbow is finally here safely in our arms.

My Beta

So...my level today was 108!!! The nurse said that was a perfect, healthy number...not too high, not too low. Chances are good we have one little charm in there. Which is PERFECT. We won't know for sure until our u/s...but I have been thinking it's one...and a boy. I feel really connected to a little boy, and awhile ago, Zoe came to me in a dream and said we were going to get pregnant with one baby, a little boy, and things were going to be fine. :-) Sweet little baby of mine...comforting her momma even in spirit. It's strange to be pregnant right now...It doesn't feel real quite yet. It does, but it doesn't. I feel really secure about this pregnancy...almost at peace. I feel deep in my heart we are going to bring home a living baby. It's will be strange to be a mother of 2, one in spirit and one here on Earth. I love Zoelle so deeply, and miss her with each breath I take. I wish she was here to share in the joy of this new life. At the same time, the new life ...