A beautiful friend of mine wrote Zoe's name in the sand...what a wonderful surprise! I now have two pictures of her name in the sand, and I love them dearly. It's interesting to me because Tim has always told me that when he passes away, he wants his ashes to be scattered in the ocean. It's not what I would want for myself, but when that day comes (hopefully many, many years from now) I will fulfill that wish for him. It seems to fit now. I see a picture of my daughters name in the sand and it makes me think about the wonders of the Ocean. it's such a beautiful peaceful place, yet full of mystery and sadness. The situation around Zoe feels similar. Thinking of her brings me to a warm, loving place, yet I am saddened by her loss and miss her with every breath I breathe. Hopefully one day soon, we will visit the ocean and write her name in the sand and other little one's who have touched our lives through this journey.
So I couldn't resist!!! I tried! Yesterday morning I woke up at 4:30 with the urge! The urge to hopefully break our BFN streak and prove to be pregnant. Well, into the bathroom I went, gingerly tip-toeing across the hardwood, attempting to avoid waking up Tim. I slowing opened the home pregnancy test package, praying that what I have been expecting was true. There I was, starring at the test...waiting for the line to arrive (Where else to go during the wee hours of the morning...I was trying not to wake up Tim, or the pups downstairs!). Then it appeared, like a magic trick right before my very own eyes! The faintest of faint pink line. It was so faint, I thought for sure it wasn't real. I bursted back into the bedroom "Tim...Tim...are yo awake?" In reply "Kate, it's 4:30 in the morning, what the heck are you doing up?" "I just took a pregnancy test, there are TWO LINES!" Tim's first reply was "why are you testing already and why at 4:...
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