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I own the bus

Yeah...that bus we all like to refer to as bitter...well I own it. Today I am feeling angry and bitter about my infertility. Why can't I just get pregnant the good old fashioned way? If it could only be as easy as "well, we weren't not trying." I just love that one! famous infertility one liners...

- just get a bottle of wine and have a good weekend!
- don't think about it, that's when it will happen
- Oh, you are just stressing yourself out
- in God's time
- I just don't understand, I am one of those people who get pregnant freakishly easy


I am sure there are plenty more where those came from...I just can't bring my brain down to such an insensitive level this early in the morning after a long night at work.

So where are we with TTC? Well, as I said before, Tim was recently laid off work. Ugh...sigh. More salt please!! Tim is actually finishing school, and goes back in August, so this summer was the perfect time for us. Now here we are and not for sure if that will happen. I am going to make my appointment at the MFM doc to at least get that ball rolling. My RE wants me to see him before I get pregnant again so we are all set up and good to go in that department. Hopefully we can get pregnant the first month! That would be splendid!

Anyway...so I guess I will try to remain the hopefully, bitter bus owner...waiting not so patiently for our time and baby #2, Zoelle's sibling.

I just looked up bitter bus in the urban dictionary (random yes, funny...for sure!)

Bitter Bus
The mode of transportation on which all thing that are bitter in nature ride.

Clever is the Bitter Bus.

Negative Nancies Ride the Bitter Bus.

Haha...I am such a negative Nancy!

Comments

  1. EricaMay 22, 2009 at 6:27 AM

    Hugs! I totally understand where you are coming from. It's so hard to wait, when you want something so badly!! I remember peeing on countless sticks when we were trying for angel and i would become more bitter with each pee stick that was negative...

    I just love the "Just give up trying to get pregnant and then it will happen!"

    ReplyDelete
  2. The KloeppingsMay 22, 2009 at 8:54 AM

    Chin up! IF sucks that's for sure but there are lots of success stories to hang on to and hope for. Although, I hear ya, it's tough trying to keep yourself from boarding the bitter bus when BFP's just keep popping up around you! Trust me, i'm kind of getting tired of it myself. I have a very fertile famly apparently and unfortunatley I'm an exception!

    I'm sitting here today nervously awaiting the phone call from the RE with my beta results. I'm pretty sure this cycle was a bust (POAS yesterday yielded a BFN)and have already started to look foward to another month of injections and violating ultrasounds:) And it's everything in me to see the brighter side of this (if there is even one) but there is one in there somewhere - 30 or 40 years ago we'd have been told that we'd never have children but thanks to modern medicine, we at least have a chance.

    Good luck on your TTC journey and I'm sending you good vibes for a sibling for Zoelle!

    Oh, and my favorite advice..."Relax! It will just happen!" or this gem, "go have drunk sex - that's how it worked for me"

    ReplyDelete
  3. Never forgetting GregoryMay 25, 2009 at 10:13 AM

    I am pregnant and STILL bitter and angry about why this had to be so much more difficult for me than for others. It isn't fair that I had to wait so long for Gregory and spend so much time and money with the RE and then lost what I worked so hard for. I have no words of wisdom because I don't think I handle this well, but you are not alone. I think I am scarred from infertility and will always feel a sting and a stab remembering how painful it is. Hugs.

    ReplyDelete
  4. BreeMay 26, 2009 at 3:34 PM

    Can I buy a pass to ride the bus? :)

    ReplyDelete

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